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General

The family is the focus of life and provides the first coping mechanism. "Sad is the house without children".

Religion plays an important part in people's lives.

A concern for Serbs living in Australia, is how will the second generation handle the care of their dying parents.

Another problem for Serbs and others now in Australia is coping with the death of a loved one back in the home country. This brings a feeling of abandonment. One way of coping with this is to pay for a mass, that resembles a funeral and to attend a meal afterwards, even though the deceased is not here.

Religion

Primarily Orthodox.

Mourning is a prescribed way of dealing with death.

Loud wailing and expression of grief is practised.

Place of treatment

One consultant felt that treatment at home was strongly preferred and that there is guilt felt if a relative dies in hospital. An Aunt said that after an operation, she was prepared to go "There", meaning a Nursing Home. "There" is outside the family. "If children won't look after me, this must mean that I have failed as a parent and the children are paying me back." There was also fear of being shamed by other families.

A second consultant felt that hospital was the treatment place of choice, followed by the home.

Communication of diagnosis/prognosis

News of diagnosis and prognosis is traditionally given to the family. The family then passes this on to relatives and friends.

Role of family/relatives/friends

Decision-making about treatment is a joint decision by the family and patient. Family and friends provide strong support. Many visitors come, to alleviate boredom and distress.

The role of health professionals/volunteers

Professionals can be highly regarded. Volunteers may not be welcome in the family home. Serbs are not used to this concept. The family and friends usually provide all the support needed. If a volunteer is sent to a family home, he/she has to be strongly recommended as an expert.

It is important for professionals to show compassion and understanding and it is extremely important that their body language reflects the words that they are saying. Serbs are not used to developing a professional relationship that ends when the patient is discharged. Any friendship developed is expected to continue and to be reciprocated.

Attitudes to pain relief

The taking of particular medicines is not taboo, but giving morphine is usually a sign being "near the end". This can increase anxiety.

The community attitude towards euthanasia

The idea of euthanasia is generally not well received, but it is an individual decision, which some may support.

Taboo words

Our consultants differed. One felt that there are no taboo words here and that Serbs in Australia accept that doctors are likely to use direct words such as cancer, death and dying. Another felt that the word death was taboo.

Cancer is sometimes seen as punishment and that it could be inherited. Also that it may be contagious.

Handling of the body

Funeral director

Burial

Serbs prefer burial to cremation.

Elaborate Mausoleums are common in Serbian culture - seen as an expression of love and loss. Mausoleums can also be a status symbol.

Serbian people visit the cemetery regularly, including at 7 days and 40 days and one year after death. Certain foods are eaten. Some spirits are drunk and some is spilt on the ground for the soul of the deceased person.

The deceased's partner and immediate family are not allowed to listen to music or to attend celebrations such as christenings and birthdays for one year. In Australia 6 weeks may be accepted.

Some Serbs want to be buried in their country of origin and their body may be flown back to Serbia.

Black clothes may be worn for one year or for life. In Australia 6 weeks may be accepted.

Men sometimes may not shave for one year.

A black arm band is a sign of mourning among men. It helps people to recognise the bereaved's pain/loss and to offer support/condolence/sympathy, which is helpful in the healing process.

Other issues

It is recommended not to point at the location of a cancer, because this "invites trouble". It is acceptable to describe a location in words.


to be continued ...

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